Don't Post It: A Guide to Social Media During Divorce

When you separate from your spouse, you may feel like shouting from the rooftops about some or all of the following: how it was your spouse’s fault that you are getting divorced, your newfound freedom from your spouse’s dead weight, your sadness and loneliness as a result of your spouse leaving, or about the difficulties of co-parenting. As attorneys who primarily represent clients with family and domestic issues, we are here to tell you: do not take to social media to air your grievances with your spouse. Utilize the tips below to monitor and manage your social media use during your separation and divorce.
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1. Limit Social Media Use. Limit your social media use or even consider temporarily deactivating your accounts (but do not delete them). If necessary, unfollow or unfriend your spouse and any friends who are closely connected with your spouse. If you are actively posting on social media, it is best for your spouse not to be privy to your social media presence. Even if you unfriend your spouse, if you are still friends with your spouse’s best friends, they will absolutely screenshot anything of interest that you post and share it with your spouse. By limiting your social media use, your spouse won’t have fodder for disagreements. 
2. Change passwords and heighten privacy restrictions. If there is any possibility your spouse knows the passwords to your social media accounts, change them immediately and turn on two-factor authentication if it is available. Your spouse may try to log into your accounts to attempt to find evidence for your impending divorce (if there’s any suspicion of adultery) or just snoop around to see if you are talking to anyone new or chatting to family and friends about the separation and divorce. Increase your privacy restrictions on all social media accounts so no posts are available to the general public for viewing. Google yourself to see what posts are available to be viewed by the general public, then be sure to restrict privacy settings (but again, do not delete) to remove those posts from a Google search.    
   
3. Don’t post about what you’re going through. While it may sound challenging, do not post on social media about the divorce and separation, including about any settlement negotiations. While it is common in today’s world to go on social media to vent about what you’re going through in your everyday life, when it comes to separation and divorce, it is best left unposted. If you need to vent, call a good friend or family member. Additionally, do not post anything negative about your spouse on social media. Even if you are not friends with your spouse, someone will inevitably screenshot your negative post and send it to your spouse, who will in turn share it with their lawyer. This can affect your settlement negotiations, especially if you have children with your spouse and child custody is at issue.  
   
4. Monitor others’ social media posts about you. Check your tagged photos and make sure your friends and family do not tag you in compromising photos. For example, being tagged in a post from a “date” with a new dating partner while separated can have an impact on your settlement negotiations and your divorce. Divorce attorneys almost always check the social media accounts of the other spouse to see what publicly available information is on the internet.

 
Talk to your lawyer if you have questions about how to proceed with social media use now that you are in the midst of a divorce. If you haven’t hired a lawyer yet, please reach out to schedule a consultation and we would be happy to guide you through the process.  

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